Everyone’s financial journey is unique.
Yet we play the shame game, we play the “what-if” game and we compare ourselves incessantly to others. There is nothing more debilitating and deflating to our financial wellness than comparing our choices and situation to someone else’s. At times, we base everything we’ve done on how someone’s highlight reel looks - and it’s not realistic. Social media has exacerbated what it means to “Keep up with the Jones’s” and a lot of us fall prey.
I am not immune.
Working in finance for 26 years should mean that I’ve always had my financial house in order, but it hasn’t always been the case.
I have had my share of missteps, missed opportunities and plain old foolery! I’ve made money, lost money, saved money and spent WAYYYYY too much money.
I’ve lived above my means at times and below. In the past I allowed a lack of guidance and a desire to keep up completely derail my financial world. And I’ve had a love/hate relationship with money for as long as I can remember.
So….. what gives? Why is this such a common story for so many of us?
In speaking with entrepreneurs, executives, family and friends over the years, I have come to realize that we all have very similar issues and concerns, but we don’t share them with anyone. How do we know that we are not alone if we don’t speak of our financial challenges or triumphs? How do we figure out what to do if we never ask for help?
I’ve said it many times before, we talk about work, sex, kids, even politics, but we find money and our story so taboo.
If we could get passed the false belief that talking about money is off limits then we could dive into a brand-new world of transparency from within our trusted networks.
Unique journeys don’t have to be lonely ones.
When we feel like we are in this together, the need to compete with others’ dissipates because we understand that we are all more alike than we let on. We understand that because everyone’s journey IS unique, everyone’s decisions are too. When we seek and receive guidance and support from people we respect we attain a sense of relief. This kind of freedom opens us up to new ways of thinking and being. We open ourselves up to the kind of guidance that could help avoid some of those financial missteps altogether because we share the things that ARE working for us.
When I finally understood that I didn’t have all the answers and started relying more on my circle of influence for advice and guidance, I finally gained more of a love relationship with money and embraced my money story. My story has become so important in my continuous financial transformation that it was the catalyst for co-creating Divine WealthWise: A platform to “guide women to becoming their best, most enlightened financial self”. We wanted a program that would allow for us to have a safe and transparent place to unleash all this financial baggage. A place to share our stories with others and a place to learn from one another and grow.
And believe me, I learn and grow every day.
Valerie Sanchez is Partner & Co-Creator of Divine WealthWise. To learn more about Divine WealthWise go to our website www.divinewealthwise.com or call us 212.344.5867